Of waters and abyss
by SlytherinPenguin
Summary: "Don't forget about me, even when I doubt you, I'm no good without you" When two broken people find themself things don't always go smothly. And love is not always clear and simple as everyone want to make you believe. REGULUSxOC ; Marauders era ; M rate ; Angst/Romance
1. Of waters and abyss - Chapter 0

_But of Waters and Abyss_

 _We all are Made After all_

Chapter 0 - Uncertainties and Possibilities.

Amber was watching the clear sky above Hogwarts grounds. The open window allowed her to breathe in the warm air of summer that was about to end. Everything had changed so quickly that sometimes she feared to close her eyes, uncertain if the reality around her could have changed even further. She couldn't have imagined that bloody summer provided her the possibility to attend Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. She wasn't a witch, not at birth. Her past was still haunting her in nightmares, making her suffocate at the weight of her memories. Everything that revolved around magic was new to her. It was unbelievable! Despite this, she liked to think that September 1st would be a fresh new start. She found herself a little excited about the imminent start of her new school. Everything in her was shattered so instead of trying to put the pieces back together, she was aiming to walk on a new path. It was not what she had wanted for herself, but still, the unexpected opportunity was a chance at a new life.

Amber's gaze drifted back to her temporary room that the headmaster Dumbledore had given her. She was in a room in the teachers' quarters. She had to wait to be sorted into one of the four houses and then she would be forced to move and share a room with other girls. She didn't like it. She wasn't ready to share a room with people she didn't know but, change was necessary for a fresh start. She was trying to force herself to accept all the new and magical things that were coming in her life. Roommates was of course one of it. The room was a real mess of tangled of parchments and books. Her belongings boiled down to her reading books, clothes and two plushies. Her school things were all around the floor and her wand was on the bed, tossed there the exact moment she had entered the room. She was forced to use it during lessons and that, for her, was more than enough. The less she used it the better of she was.

Amber had worked hard for the last three months to make up for the magical subjects she had not been a part of for four years. She had already met her new professors when she was being tutored to prepare for Wizarding School. She carried herself to her bed and reluctantly picked up her wand. She snorted, disgusted by the piece of wood in her hand. She treated the foreign object as if it was infected and walked over to the opened window. She smirked, ready to rid herself of the wand. Just when she was about to toss the wand out of the window a voice stopped her.

"If I were you I wouldn't do that Ms. Woods." Dumbledore interrupted.

He stood at the doorway of her room and lightly smiled.

"Oh, I forgot to knock." Dumbledore continued after appraising the shock on Amber's face.

He knocked on the door as if doing so could make amends. Amber lowed slowly her hand, the grip still firm on the hated wand. She watched it for a second and then she moved her gaze to the headmaster. She couldn't stand his piercing eyes and she lowered her gaze to her feet. She looked like a scolded-kid. There was an infinite minute of silence until Dumbledore started to speak.

"I am truly sorry for your unfortunate situation, miss, but I will advise you to not try to destroy or lose what is now your own wand." He looked at her above his half-moon spectacles with serious eyes.

"Yeah, I understand." She replies and doesn't dare look him straight in the eyes again.

He gave her a nod and continued with the speech.

"That being said, it is not like I can't sympathize with you, Ms. Woods. I highly recommend that you don't think about the wand as your enemy. You must remember that it is only a piece of wood, at the end of the day. As a muggle, it is important that you understand that people are the true power behind wands. Yes, wands revolve around magic, but it can't perform magic without you. Your wand needs your will to accomplish magic."

She understood that, of course she did, but everything that revolved around the wand was sick and made her only want to puke.

"Sir, are you sure there is no other choice? I mean, there are plenty of other wands," she sighed and then uneasily continued with, "Why do I have to keep this one? Why?"

Her voice was cracking from the memories of that night and she felt like she was breaking. Her eyes became slightly red as tears wanted to fall, but she didn't want to surrender to them. She wanted to withstand them. She needed to be strong now.

"I'm afraid there is no other choice. The wand chose you that night. That wand will be your only wand. Whether you admit it or not, regardless of whether you wanted it to or not, that wand saved your life."

Amber nodded, afraid that talking would have meant letting the tears fall down. She didn't want to cry, not anymore.

That wand chose her. It's the wand that chooses the witch, not the reverse. That wand, God knows why, wanted her. She couldn't run away from this curse. It doesn't matter how much she wanted to, the trail of blood would always follow her through that damned Larch wand. Not to mention, after all that Dumbledore had done for her, she knew she couldn't disrespect him. She acknowledged his efforts to give her a new life; she had somewhere to stay.

"Thank you, sir, for all that you have done for me. I'll never be grateful enough." She said after a long silence with the most resolute voice she could have made at that moment.

"Ah but Miss Woods, you have already paid me enough by accepting to attend Hogwarts for the years that will come." Dumbledore warmly smiles.

I can't help but kindly smile back.

"I have to leave you now, but I do hope your heart is lighter," He nodded to himself and he started walk away before return to her, "One last thing. Don't be so hard with yourself and give yourself time. Time is a great ally with wounds. Even though some wounds will never disappear entirely they can be still be healed."

Amber watched Dumbledore disappear before her eyes. She turned and watched her reflected image in the window, her wand in her hand. She couldn't see a witch. She couldn't see wounds. She could only see a murderer.

-oIo-

Nothing is ever like your home. Nothing else can give you the comfort of being in the right place completely safe. Regulus had never felt this way when he was at home, especially after his older brother abandoned this family, his family. Sirius turned his back to his own bloodline becoming a blood traitor, an exile. Regulus remembered vividly his mother burning Sirius's image on the family tapestry. No one had shed any tears when Sirius ran away. He was no longer part of the family. Sometimes it didn't feel like Sirius was ever part of the family. Sirius was too different from Regulus. They didn't share anything in common except for the blood that ran through their veins and their physical features: both had grey eyes, raven hair, and the same haughty good looks, nothing more. He hated from the bottom of his heart to be associated with such a traitor like Sirius.

Soon he would have to leave his home and go back to Hogwarts for his 5th year of school. He didn't want to think that going back to Hogwarts was a salvation, freedom from his family. He wasn't his brother, Sirius, but Regulus acknowledged that he felt a strange uneasiness since the start of summer. He couldn't explain why, but something in his guts was bothering him. Something seemed off, like something really bad had happened. Nothing bad had happen lately. He never felt like this in his life, not after Sirius had left them. Why he was feeling this way was a mystery to him, but he didn't want to care too much about it. He snapped from his thoughts when Kreacher entered his room without any warning.

"Master Regulus, Madame Walburga sent Kreacher to his young master to tell him she needs to talk with him. And she says it's urgent, master, really urgent." He bowed to Regulus and then left the room closing the door.

Regulus rolled over the bed now facing the ceiling of his room, his arms behind his head. Now the weight of the prestigious heritage of the ancient Black family is on his young shoulders. He can't make any mistakes. Failure isn't an option. He's a Black; he is not a common wizard. He is the son of one of the purest bloodline that is still alive. He is born to be better than the others; he is born for rule. He hasn't any other possibilities. He is Regulus Arcturus Black.

 **A/N** : Welcome to the 2.0 version of these fanfic! This is a revisioned version written in a good english. Why? Because the sweet **Dancing-Souls** offered her help to beta testing what I'm going to write. English isn't my first language so...I wanted to publish this story I had on my mind lately so bad no matter what. I hope people will understand that I'm really trying hard on this ~ Thanks to all and at the end I want to point out that reviews are appreciate and help me improve. For real, 'cause sometimes I get lost in this language. I'll replay to all of them.

 **M:** right now it's mostly for the language and the dark thematic will come eventually.

This is going to be a long _fic_ so maybe it starts slowly, I don't know, but I promise I have everything on my mind and the big parts are waiting to come (?).


	2. Chapter I - Restarts and burdens

**Warning:** M rate for dark thematics and language.

 **Beta Tester:** Thanks again to Dancing Souls for her help

 **I don't own Harry Potter or any character beside my OC and the idea of this story, nothing more.**

* * *

 _Chapter I - Restarts and burdens._

After a summer spent studiously studding magic, Amber was as prepared as she could be.

Albus Dumbledore insisted to give her tutors for Charms and Transfiguration after being sorted and she had to accept, adding also that this was a good chance to make some new friends. It was easy to agree, everybody needs friends after all. She was quite the lone wolf but she wanted to change this thing too. Fresh new start, she continued repeating herself, almost like a good vibes charm. Everything was going to change for the better.

Her only hobbies behind that walls, beside studying hard, were reading and a thing she discovered being really good at: Wizard's Chess. She even managed to beat Dumbledore, only once (and she was sure he was too occupied with Fanny, his Phoenix that burned right in the middle of their match) but hey, it's still something beat Dumbledore, isn't it? Initially she didn't think studying magic would have been so hard. But she remarked to herself that this for sure was a muggle's thought.

The so waited 1st of September at the end came. Amber couldn't choose if she was scared to death or anxious to death. With Dumbledore they accorded to give to her a new identity, so that she wasn't related with that "accident" in the wizards' world as in the muggles' ones, in order also to avoid any question about it. She wasn't ready to manage to talk about what had happened last summer, so opting for a brand new identity was the wisest choice. Now, thanks to Dumbledor's kindness and help, she was Amber Rose Woods, a born witch and a far relative of Dumbledore, moved to Hogwarts to attend her 3 last years of school. A fresh new restart.

Amber was sorted that evening before the regular Sorting Ceremony in order to avoid an awkward and embarassing parade with eleven years old students. The Sorting Hat on her head, the complete boar of regents with eyes on her, waiting for the verdict. She didn't mind where she'd been sorted, every house was the same at the end for her. She really didn't care. Amber heard, inside her head, The Sorting Hat exploring every little cranny of her mind and she could hear him weighing and judging her, puzzling about the best choice.

"I can't possibly make any better choice. I can see it clearly. This suffering, this pain, this anger, trying to drown you. I can see your willingness falter and, at the same time, I can feel you desire grow increasigly. Ah, all this potential it's mixed with an incredible emotional side, making you dangerous and dreadful. You are ready to slaughter anyone standing in your way, aren't you? You are defintly perfecly shaped for be a...SLYTHERIN." The Sorting Hat's shout rang loud and clear. Slughorn clapped his hands pleased as he was the Head of Slytherin House. He liked her. Maybe it's was pity more than anything but it's still something positive having a professor on your side, especially when you'r talking about the Head of House.

Amber was going to divide her room it with 3 other girls. One of them was going to be her charms' tutor as Flitwick reassured "She's one of my brilliant Slytherin students and a lovely girl" so if she hadn't liked the chick she was forced to stick near her ass anyway. Perfect. Slughorn helped Amber move her few personal effects to the girl's dormitory. The Slytherin common room was dark and humid, in the cold dungeons of Hogwarts, underneath the Black Lake. It was really huge, with couches and chairs in black leather, a big round tea table and a table with a chessboard. The windows were big and they loomed directly into the depths of the Black Lake, allowing to see from time to time some aquatic creature. Amber didn't know to swim but loved water. At the end, aside from the water waiting to drown her outside, she liked that location very much. Slughorn left her to settle up her things in her new room before the dinner.

She changed fast with her new Slytherin suit. She wore up her messy wavy silver-brown hair with a clip, leaving only two streaks that fell on her shoulders. Amber watched her image reflected on the mirror, her amber eyes on the reflection in front of her. _Everything will be fine. See? You're even cute with your uniform, you don't stick out. You're a witch like everyone in this school. Don't you dare to panic now. You're not a kid anymore. Besides you have your wand anyway. You know how to kill people if you need to, it isn't even your first_...but then she slapped her face. If anyone would have come right at that moment they would have thought for sure that she was totally nuts. She decided to leave the room. This loneliness was making her very anxious and was starting to make her think about wrong things. Right when she was almost out of the Slytherin dorm she bumped into a girl.

"Ouch"

"Oh god, I'm sorry!" Amber flushed.

"Don't worry." The mysterious girl smiled.

She was gorgeous, one of the most beautiful girls she had ever seen. She had this long straight chocolate hair with cute bangs; her eyes were like ice: a mix of grey and light blue. She was pale, with porcelain skin that seemed smooth like the finest velvet. Amber was so stunned by the girl's beauty that she couldn't pry her eyes away from the girl.

"Oh, you must be Amber! I'm Andromeda Black, a Prefect and also your roommate and tutor in Charms. Nice to meet you." She said offering her hand with happiness printed all over her face.

"Nice to meet you too. Sorry for bothering you with the tutor thing..." but Andromeda didn't let her finish the sentence.

"Are you kidding me?! It's a pleasure for me to help a comrade," she giggled, "There aren't many girls here, at least not any that I particularly like." She whispered with a hand covering her mouth. She had a really sweet and calm voice.

"I was so happy when I heard a new girl was joining Slytherin." She continued with a happy smile.

"C'mon, we need to reach the Great Hall or we're going to miss the Sorting Ceremony. Oh, I have to present you to your other roommates too!" Andromeda reminded.

When the two girls arrived at the Great Hall and reached the Slytherin table, students were starting to cross the room to find their seats. A herd of starving students swarmed the Slytherin table, along with a girl who sat down in front of Amber and Andromeda. Amber was starting to become a little excited, but she told herself it could have just been the atmosphere. The room was bubbling with excitement of all the students gathered together.

"Hi Dromeda." The girl said.

She moved her eyes to Amber, staring at her with a condescending look, her nose pointed high to the ceiling. She had curly shoulder-length platinum hair and black eyes. "I'm Eris Carrow, and you," she pointed a long finger at her emphasizing the last word "must be my new roommate if I'm not mistaken and I am most certainly not mistaken."

Andromeda smiled at Eris and swung her arm out to introduce Amber. "Yes, may I introduce you Amber Rose Woods."

They watched the sorting ceremony in silence and then spent the rest of their dinner listening to Eris, the blondie, chatting about frivolous things and gossiping about other students. She was too occupied about herself to ask Amber any personal questions or even care if anyone was truly paying attention to her. Amber, on the other hand, liked not being in the center of the attention. Amber was glad it didn't go as she had feared it would.

Andromeda interrupted Eris to ask Amber a question, gaining a killing gaze from the blondie.

"You can't always rule the conversation, you know?" Andromeda said with a grave voice.

The blondie took it like an insult and fell silent, looking upset. Eris could only last five minutes before she started to talk again; she had remembered some gossip she had forgotten. Andromeda sighed surrendered.

"Oh, bloody hell! I almost forgot I have my duties as a Prefect." Andromeda said when the dessert was gone, biting her lips. "I leave Amber in your care."

Andromeda stood up and joined the most handsome boy Amber had ever seen, leaving her alone with Eris. Amber saw him and Andromeda chat a little and realized they were already on familiar terms. She couldn't take her eyes off of him. She was certain that he had to be Andromeda's boyfriend. She watched them leave the room, followed by a group of first year students.

The way back to the common room was crowded. Eris was definitely self-centered, but somehow managed to stop talking about herself long enough to ask Amber personal questions. "How many boys have you dated? Is your family rich? Your family must have money; you're a relative of Dumbledore after all. When was your first kiss?"

Amber responded with simple "yes", "no" or "I don't know" to all the questions. She didn't want to seem rude to her roommate possible friend.

Unfortunately Amber's luck ran out when Eris asked a sensitive question. "Are you a virgin?"

Amber's step faltered and she became pale. All of a sudden it became harder to breath and it felt like there wasn't enough oxygen in the hallway to keep her going. Her eyes became unfocused and her thoughts became hazy. She knew the question was asked frivolously, a question asked either to get closer to you or to embarrass you.

In fact after seeing her expression Eris continued with fake innocence. "Oh sorry, I'm such a goof. I didn't mean to embarrass you, of course. You must be a virgin. Well, there is nothing bad..."

Amber cut her off with her most venomous glare. Her body language expressing that she didn't want to talk about it.

"I'm not." She replied dryly.

Eris, caught off guard for an instant, bounced back quickly ready to seize the moment and start bragging about her numerous sexual experiences. Amber dismissed Eris once they were in the common room and went straight to bed. The conversation with Eris left her in a bad mood.

-oIo-

Before the sorting ceremony, McGonagall had cornered Regulus. He was quite surprised to see his Transfiguration professor so out of breath and wondered what was so important that she rushed to come see him.

"You all right, Black?" McGonagall greeted. "You have a new classmate who needs tutoring on Transfiguration. I have selected you since you are one of my most skilled students and she'll be in your class. You will help her during the class and outside of class if it is necessary."

Regulus' eyes widened and he snapped. "What?"

"I won't repeat myself; you heard me. You should think of this as recognition of your Transfiguration abilities. Helping som-"

Regulus cut her off. "Even if she praises me, professor, I decline, sorry."

"I didn't call you out to flatter your ego, Black. Everything's already been settled. I'm afraid you can't decline. Now, may you excuse me?" She left him in a hurry.

Fuck. Tutoring others was just a pain in the ass. He didn't give a fuck about B category wizards who couldn't handle their magic. However, it would be a lie if Regulus claimed he wasn't curious. If he wasn't mistaken, McGonagall talked about the new student being a girl. The new girl was placed in Slytherin and that did pique his interest, but did not make him feel any more inclined to babysit the incompetent girl. Plus he was a Prefect, so he already had his own bothering duties. He rolled his eyes in annoyance and entered the Great Hall. He didn't even bother to check for the new girl.

After dinner, however, he and Andromeda, as Prefects, had to lead the first years, so when she started shouting, "First years please follow me," he was already at her side, arms crossed watching in annoyance the little Slytherins.

"Hi Regulus!" Andromeda smiled softly at him. They started to guide the crowd throw the castle were the dungeons laid.

"Stop spacing out you idiots and follow us!" He shouted to a group of boys.

Andromeda giggled near him. "You know," started Andromeda beside him, "we have a new girl in our class! Her name's Amber Rose Woods. She's reaaaaaally cute."

"And a completely retarded." Andromeda was watching him with a scowl.

"What? It's true. She needs me to tutor her in Trasfiguration! In her 5th year! You're supposed to take your O.W.L.s in your 5th and she needs tutors?" Regulus shaked his head incredulous.

"Regulus," she said with a mandatory warning, "be a good classmate, please. You're a Prefect now. You should start to be a good boy..."

"Me?! I take that as an insult. I'm always good, Dromeda. I'm not the bad apple in the family."

Andromeda rolled her eyes at Regulus and listened as he continued to rant. "She is a burden from the start and I have yet to meet her! Royal blood."

He said pissed off at the stone wall before him. The wall started to move aside revealing the hided Slytherin common room. "Get your asses in. Faster please!" He said watching the little crowd of first years enter the common room.

"First years, this is the common room and you need to remember the password to enter here…Left man's dormitory, right girl's dormitory." Andromeda shouted pointing the staircases to the dorms.

"Maybe I should introduce you to Amber?" Andromeda proposed carefully.

Regulus huffed in protest. "I pass, thank you."

"You're an asshole, you know it right?"

"I love you too, dear." He smiled to Andromeda and wished her goodnight.

He passed by Eris as he headed to the boys' dormitory and ignored her as she smiled at him with her lustful eyes. He disappeared into his room. Maybe this evening he was seriously an asshole more than usual. He had to admit that 1st of September founded him in a very bad mood.

* * *

 _ **A/N:**_ My old good for nothing computer died 3 times while I was writing this chapter -.- Hurray. Happy Autumn to everyone (?) Hope you enjoy this season as much as me. Nothing to say about this chapter, I know they haven't done anything yet, BUT, I didn't want to rush the events. This first part (involving all the 5th year) will be less angsty and more focused on their first impressions and emotions. *waves goodbye.


	3. Chapter II - Friendship and judgments

**M rate** for language. I don't own Harry potter

 _Chapter II – Friendship and judgments._

The morning hit Amber like an hammer in the face. She didn't sleep well, partially because she needed time to settle herself in her new life and partially because of her nightmares. She hoped that, with the time passing by things would have been easier for her. She didn't hope to forget, she knew from the start she hadn't enoguht strong to free herself from the past and for sure she couldn't believe things would have been easier now just because her world was full of magic. She feared something was broken forever inside her and she wouldn't been able to stop her nightmares or her pain no matter how desperately she wanted to. The fate however granted her the luck (or the misfortune) to move forward, to go on with what was left of her life. She had only one option: take that chance by hand and start moving her ass, facing what was waiting ahead her life.

Andromeda was already prepared when Amber opened her eyes and started to complain about Amber's slowness, pointing out that she needed to move her ass or they'd be late for breakfast. Amber was in a state of pure coma and breakfast was the last of her problems that morning. At the end she couldn't defeat Andromeda and she was dragged out by the arm still half dressed. Her long ash-brown hair were all messed because of the bed. She was still trying to gather them up when they reached the Great Hall. Amber and Andromeda had a fast breakfast with Eris before the start of the lessons. Eris was silent with a grave look on her face and this wasn't for sure a good sign.

"So, let me see..." Amber was looking at the timetable Slughorn gave her a moment before "First and second period we have Charms, followed by...two hours of Transfiguration! Oh c'mon! They want me death already at Monday's morning! How will I be able to survive the rest of the week if things start like this?" Perfect. Just fucking Perfect.

"Don't worry, I'll be sure to make you survive. You can count on me." Andromeda smiled soflty  
"Instead, please, don't count on me and leave me out of this tutor's thing. I have my own commitments. The 5th year is a nuisance and I need to work hard if I want to take enough Owls. I'm sure Andromeda would not slow my work but you…well Amber, let's say I don't want to be dragged on the bottom with you." Eris darted between the two girls in a very bad mood with despise in her eyes. Not a good sign indeed. Andromeda ignored Eris and Amber forced herself to do the same. She hadn't the necessary strength to start a fight in the morning, or so she thought.

"Oh shit, I forgot my parchments." Andromeda sighed. "I'll be right back, you two go ahead, I'll catch you" and so Amber was left with Eris. Again.  
"Why this bad mood?" tried out Amber quite interested. Eris sighed relaxing a little bit.  
"Just a shag that doesn't want to be shagged." Amber laughed at her response and was followed by Eris who seemed a little cheered up. "Oh sorry, I forgot you're miss not-a-virgin-anymore." Amber sent a killer gaze in her direction but she noticed the blond interest was now settle away, right on the handsome boy that Amber saw the dinner before. "Good morning, darling." Eris started to play with her hair, winking at him. Amber followed the guy that was approaching them with her eyes. Looking at him closely he was even more stunning and handsome. He had this silver-grey eyes in contrast with his raven hair. But he had this aura around him that Amber didn't like. He seemed like the arrogant, cynic, bastard type.

"Whatever" he replayed entering the class without even look at them.  
"I swear to God I'll shag him even if this is the last thing I'll do in my entire life" she stated determinate.  
"Oh, so it's him the mysterious unfuckable guy that makes you upset. I thought he was Andromeda's boyfriend"  
"Well, you can say that somehow."  
So, Amber wasn't sure if they were a couple, but still Eris wanted to shag her friend's lover? What a bitch. Eris sat with a girl as close as possible to Regulus.

Amber was with Andromeda near Professor Flitwick in order to follow better Amber's work during his lesson. For Amber point of view that first lesson was honestly awful. She didn't hate Charms even if her wand wasn't able to do an accurate job (of course it had to be wand's fault) but that day she was almost at the non-return point. Not only because Amber wasn't good with her Summoning Charms but also because it was perceptible that she was the worst one there. She was angry, she didn't want to be remembered as the wimp of Charms. Amber was brooding so much that when Flitwick asked her to perform the charm she set his hair on fire by mistake and was followed by laugh of scorn of the whole class till the end of the lesson. Really, that was fucking perfect. Could it have been worst? She hoped not. Andromeda tried to cheer her up but everything was useless. Every classmate she crossed her eyes with was barely able to contain giggles.

Amber really hoped from the bottom of her heart that Transfiguration would gone better, but she knew she was destined to be an unlucky witch. Her fate was doomed from the very start.  
"Oh, Woods came here for a moment." Amber was called by professor McGonnagall when she put her foot in. Beside McGonnagall leaned Regulus with crossed arms and a pissed expression. He looked like a spoiled kid who was scolded.  
"Here, may I introduce you your tutor during Transfiguration's classes. You two can sit near the desk, please. He's going to help you after classes too." He didn't say a word so Amber tried her best to break the ice even thought he looked really like an awful person.

"Hi, I'm Amber as you may already heard around. I'm new" She tried to smile. "If I'm correct you're Regulus. I hope we will get along well. Ehm, I'm sorry for this thing, I didn't want to bother anyone." she offered her hand to him with a tiny smile.  
"I bet you." He replayed dry, his eyes on hers for a brief second before starting to put his stuff on the desk. She quickly withdrew her hand a little embarrassed and afflicted.

She didn't know how to deal with this boy, but she had to do something, right? He was her tutor afterall, she needed his help. Was he forced to help her maybe? Did he think she was a burden? Well, of course she was one, but what she could have done about it? It wasn't her fault for not being good with magic, who fucking knew what magic was in the first place? She was just a common girl, she didn't expect none of this. She couldn't be blamed about it. They were asking her to apologize for not being a good witch when, on the first place, she wasn't even supposed to be one of them? She had all this expectation, all this people that put her under pressure. Certainly they were been kind but they didn't have a choice, like her. She didn't have anything left, only her will to go on. What was she supposed to do? Wasn't already hard for her? Wasn't she trying enough hard to make things go well? Wasn't it enough? She was on the edge of panic, scared, lonely, powerless, afflicted by her own worries and emotion, when the boy next her suddenly said "Just try to don't set my hair on fire, if it's not too hard for you." With a mischievous voice.

It was a second. Her brain was drained by that words, her heart free by the emotion that were afflicting her. Now Amber was on the edge of bursting out of rage. An asshole. A completely fucking mean asshole. The person that was chose to help her was nothing more than a jerk. How was she supposed to learn something more or get any help if this guy was a totally son of a bitch? It was hard to control herself at that point. How could she have known this guy for only 5 minutes and already hate him? It seemed incredible but Amber started to think about the possibility that she was going to hate Transfiguration even more than Herbology, where she spent the whole summer trying not to kill any living plants. She processed the nasty comment, took a big breathe but her emotive limit was already reached.

"How is possible that a nice girl like Andromeda's dating an arrogant jerk with a pole stiffed in his ass like you?" she said with a mean smirk. He turned to her with one of the most scariest gaze she had ever seen in her life. "Were you talking with me by any chance?" he said bitterly.  
"Well yes, sir, it appears to be like this. Always if Andromeda doesn't have an harem full of cunts like you, in that case yes again, I was talking to you in particular and also I'm sorry for her, it must be hard" She was carried away. She knew she had gone too far but she was like this: a terrible mix of acid and poison. You didn't know when she was ready to kill the cat unless you didn't want to open the box. Furthermore she hated to be mocked. She didn't care if Andromeda was his girlfriend or if Eris wanted to shag him, or if he was a total hot mess...he was a jerk. She already started the day with the wrong foot, she didn't need a fucker to help her ruin the rest of that day.

For a second, and just a second, Amber saw him losing his cool kid facade, and for a moment, just for a moment, she thought he was going to punch her in the face. Then a light appeared in his eyes, he laid his elbow on the desk and he rested his head in his palm looking in her eyes surprised. "Who said Andromeda is my girlfriend?"  
"Eris. She said you could say it more or less. What, it was a secret?" She rolled her eyes, unsatisfied whit his response. She expected him to make her pay for what she had say. Now that he replied to her calm and composed it looked like Amber was the one at fault for assaulting him. Amber, disappointed, moved her gaze to the professor's desk trying to ignore him, unable to cross his cold and piercing eyes. She still felt his glance on her despite he wasn't talking at all.

She decided, bummed by being observed for too long, to be brave and turn her eyes on Regulus' ones once again. She felt her guts entwined while they were looking to each other silently. She was way too surprised when he opened his mouth this time.  
"I can tell why your name is Amber." he said calmly still watching her right in her eyes. "Ehm, sorry?"  
"Your eyes" he said pointing them. "are really like liquid amber. It's really an uncommon color, they're almost like a light orange brown surrounded by gold." Amber was puzzled, slightly embarrassed by Regulus' unexpected observation. He wasn't trying to flatter her, that was sure, he just pointed out the color of her eyes. This wasn't changing anything, he was still a completely jerk. McGonnagall cleared her voice and started the lesson. Regulus and Amber turned to the professor's desk and didn't approach each other until the end of the lesson. Amber was happy about her first lesson, she didn't have to anything with her wand. They had a general check and warnings in preparation of the upcoming Owls. Amber wasn't equally happy about her Transfiguration's tutor. At least she really didn't set anyone on fire. She sighed.

At the end of the lesson she was approached by Andromeda. "I'm starting to panic for this exams, I swear."  
"Why, you're a talented witch Andromeda. If someone should be panic here, well it's not you." Regulus was still beside her and entered the conversation giving to Amber a dark glare that she returned. Andromeda was desperate, clearly seeing her two friends despising each others. It appears like they were oil and water.

"Hey Regulus, why don't you eat with us?" both Amber and Regulus turned to Andromeda watching her like she was totally insane.  
"I'm sorry Andromeda but I need to talk to Slughorn about the Qudditch team" Amber didn't know if it was a well settle lie or he was telling the true, but she was happy he didn't want to spend the lunch in her company as much as she didn't want to. Maybe it was her fault Andromeda couldn't spend time with the boy she liked. She definitely had to blame herself for this situation. She couldn't still believe this were Andromeda's taste in men.

Andromeda and Amber reached the Great Hall silently when finally Amber spoke.  
"So, uhm, is he really your boyfriend? I mean, I don't have any clue about how you're able to stand by him, let alone be his girlfriend."  
"Sorry, what?"  
"C'mon, you can't deny he's really unsupportable."  
"I think you lost me. Who are we talking about again?"  
"Regulus!" Amber clarify exasperated.  
"Oh no, I don't deny he's unsupportable sometimes." she giggled.  
"So what, do you like controversial relationships? Like being with a boy you don't really like? All that angst shit." She made a hand gesture. "Don't tell me he has a big d-" she couldn't finish her sentence as a flushed red Andromeda was tapping Amber mouth with her hand, horror printed all over her face. "First. The hell are you talking about. Second. There are people around us…you…you can't talk about this things with loud voice!" Andromeda was incredibly red. Amber removed Andromeda's hand off her mouth and grinned mischievous at her. "So does he really have a big dick?" she whispered in Andromeda's hear. She saw Andromeda froze on her feet and Amber grinned widely at her reaction. "Amber Rose Woods. You don't have any decency at all! And what the hell do you think I would know anyway?! Since when you're so interested in his…his…his thing!" she shouted the last word. "You're acting like Eris and this is not a good thing. Not at all." Amber was really amused.

"Listen, I really just can't understand how can Regulus be your damn boyfriend."  
"What? He's not my boyfriend! Regulus Arcturus Black is my cousin, you idiot!" Andromeda was appalled and Amber was paralyzed. She just asked to Andromeda about his cousin's dick. "Who told you that?"  
"Eris said it was like this. I mean, I asked her if he was your boyfriend, 'cause I thought he had to be, and she told me it was like this…in a sort of way? And then I asked about it to him, during Trasfiguration, and he didn't deny!" "You asked him?!" Andromeda face palmed herself and now Amber was embarrassed about how things turned out. That bastard. She let him take the piss. Andromeda and Amber sat down at Slytherin table. Regulus luckily wasn't in sight. Andromeda sighed beside Amber and started to eat. Amber didn't know what to say anymore so she started to eat as well even thought she wasn't hungry. "Listen, we're not a couple. Not officially I mean."  
"So you like each other?!"  
"Please let me finish. We're not an official couple but we are…betrothed." Amber dropped her fork and jaw, staring at Andromeda speechless.  
"It's not our choice. Lately there aren't plenty pure-blood's families and the Black is one of the most ancient and "untouched". We descend by a long bloodline of pure bloods. Our family is very proud of it so nobody want to stain the good name of the great Black family with a marriage with between non pure-blood consorts. That's why, if Regulus can't find a pure blood wife of a respectable family he has to marry me. At least that what they opted for."  
"But…but you are relatives!"  
"I know it, and it's exactly because of this that the idea came out easily. This is a sure way to not stain our blood. Same family, same blood. Like this they're sure to maintain the purity of the blood with their offspring. Relatives' marriages were a common thing, now it's a less quoted choice but it's not really prohibited. A marriage between cousins it's a common thing, I mean, there are marriages between brothers and sisters in ancient families." She laughed nervously.

"So you wish to marry Regulus?"  
"Oh God no. For me he's like a brother. I can't do a thing like this. It makes me nauseous only think about it. I want to marry someone I love, no matter what family he came from. I don't want to submit always to my family's sick requests. But you see, Regulus….well he's different."  
"He's a man, he was praised to be the heir, to be the one who will lead the Black's dynasty. He would do anything if his family asks him. Anything to not blacken the good name of Blacks. Even die for them if they ask him to do so. I can understand why his brother left the family. But know, more than ever, the weight of the whole Black's family his in shoulders since he's the last male heir. He feel all the pressure and the responsibilities on him. He wouldn't care to marry me. He simply will put his and my happiness aside." Andromeda eyes were red and she forced herself to smile despise the sadness in her voice. Amber felt like shit for made her talk about it. She should have shuttled her mouth. This weren't her own business, she should have stayed out of it.  
"I'm terribly sorry, I didn't know it, so forgive me. I'll never ask anything again" Amber put her hand on Andromeda's left shoulder. In response she shacked her head with a tiny smile.  
"I'm happy I talked to it about you. This isn't your fault anyway, you don't need to feel guilty about this issue. It's not even a secret. I only wished Eris had your kindness after founding it out" she rolled her eyes. "If you'll ever want to talk with me about anything, I'll be pleased to talk to you. We are friends after all, aren't we?" Amber smiled at her with less regret in her heart.

They spent all the lunch trying to know each other better. Amber learned that Andromeda was indeed a very talented witch, that she had a older sister and a younger sister, she liked the scarlet color, she was born in March, she hated rainy days and she had a scar on her left knee from when Sirius, Regulus' older brother, pushed her from a cliff. They talked the whole day about all the frivolous things they came out. What they like and what they didn't. Amber was the one more restrained a open up and talk about her life. Andromeda understood as she didn't put Amber under pressure and tried instead to avoid the questions changing subject. Andromeda was a really nice and lovely girl. Amber was glad to met her.  
That afternoon they had Herbology and Andromeda was really amused by the attitude of the professor towards Amber: she was totally scared. Every time she touched a fucking plant, they tried to avoid her touch and seemed to want to escape their own vase. Most of the killer plants in the greenhouse feared Amber and after she touched them they assumed an unhealthy yellow color. The teacher was in pain and totally desperate. After an hour of lesson the Professor asked if only Andromeda could do her the courtesy to touch her plants and she left the two glaring at Amber, taking with her an half death plant. Maybe she could get an easy permission to skip Herbology. The Professor for sure didn't want to see all her greenhouse die.

After Herbology's lesson, they had some free time before dinner and Andromeda volunteered to help Amber with her Charms, asking Flitwick the permission to use the charm's classroom. They practiced until dinner time. They came back to Slytherin common room to drop their bags. On the big black couch with an arm over his eyes laid an asleep Regulus Black.  
"I suspect lately his having sleep problems" sighed concerned Andromeda. "I go upstairs and I drop our bags, meanwhile try to wake him up please. He can't skip dinner." Amber approached the couch where he was laying observing his regular and deep breaths. She was looking his chest go up and down slightly, his lips parted. He totally was a hot mess. For a moment she thought about hundreds horrible ways to wake him up. At the end she decided she didn't want to be quite the bitch. "Black" she said softly to him. Regulus didn't move an inch. Amber decided to get more closer to him, swooping down his half covered face, biting her lower lip. She put her hand on his arm and tried to pull that away gently. Her face was too close to his, she could feel his breath on her lips. "Black, wake up, it's dinner time." Regulus' eyes suddenly widened. He snapped in a sit position, hitting hard against Amber's head who let her slip a curse. "What the hell where you trying to do?" Regulus was rubbing his aching forehead. "I was trying to make you have a dinner, you moron. The hell do you think I was doing? Choke you on you sleep? You self-centered bastard…" Amber was belt over with her hands on her head.  
"Regulus, it's dinner time." Andromeda trotted beside Amber watching them with interrogative eyes. "So…We wait you?" Regulus seemed a little confused, then he gave Amber a scowl that she returned with more hate. "Go on."  
"But regulus-"  
"Andromeda I'm not a five years old, I can take care of myself, thank you."  
"Fine. I don't care if you want to eat or die starving, I would like to remember that you're still a Prefect and not only you're negligent on your duties, but also acting like an ungrateful whiny piece of shit and I can report you anytime. Come Amber, let's leave this jerk" Andromeda turned on her heels insulted. Amber was watching Andromeda whit admiration when she heard Regulus huff behind them. "Wait, I'm coming." Andromeda turned to him with a wide smug. Regulus was annoyed but he didn't complain and obey to Andromeda.

The three of them walked to the Great Hall where they took their sit. Regulus was in front of Amber and she felt incredibly and incomprehensibly non at ease. Regulus didn't talk much during the whole dinner, he seemed really tired. Perhaps he was having nightmares too. Amber just watched him silently. She moved her gaze to his lips and she barely blushed. At that moment, as if he catched this, he turned his eyes from his plate to Amber's ones. "You know it's rude to stare at people?" Amber upset and embarrassed turned her eyes to Andromeda, starting a long conversation about the first thing came her mind opting to ignore completely the obnoxious guy sit in front of her. She ended up forgetting about him who went totally silent. When they were eating their desserts, Professor Slughorn approached them euphoric.  
"Miss Black, Miss Woods" He smiled politly at them. "Sir" Replayed the two girls. "Black, are you ready next Saturday for the trials of the new players?"  
"Sure thing, Sir. Is the playground free?"  
"Oh yes. Free and reserved. We're going to be the first to start the trials for the new team formation." He said pompous over blowing his chest. "The first you go the better it is, I say. I'm depending on you this year, Black." He winked at Regulus proud then he moved his gaze to Amber and he slightly leaned over her. "Are you ready Miss Woods? Tomorrow it's time for Potions. I want you to prove everyone what you're made of." Amber smiled encouraged while Regulus sought a giggle he couldn't repress. Slughorn caught this and turned to Regulus with a serious look. "I can assure you, Black, that your remark is completely out of line." He pointed Amber with a sappy smile. "This little girl right in front of you aspires to become one of the best in her, and your, Potions' course. Yessir." Regulus didn't look convinced. Amber in response stuck her tongue out with a grin. He watched her with an indecipherable gaze. "All right guys, it's all I had to say. Enjoy your dessert, at least you who can" he touched his fat belly sadly. He walked away before turning to them with his hands towards the rooftop shouting "Go Slytherin!"  
"He's quite something. He already stole your Saturday, eh?" Regulus sighted to Andromeda a little afflicted. Amber noticed that Regulus was staring and she said with the most dismissive voice she could came out "Didn't you know that is rude to stare?" Regulus gripped more firmly the fork in his hand and he watched her with daggers in his eyes. Then he stood up and left the room wishing goodnight only at Andromeda.

"He's quite something!" Amber was angry and Andromeda smiled at her. "He's just no used to new people" Andromeda shrugged.  
"He has the attitude of a little spoiled child." Said sour Amber. "Well, he's definetly a spoiled child."  
"Oh, sorry, then he's clearly forgiven." Amber rolled her eyes  
"I think you two resemble each other's way too much." Amber watched Andromeda shocked with an upset glare.  
"What did you just say, sorry?!" Andromeda laughed. "Since when do you think I'm a spoiled obnoxious girl?!"  
"Since never, dumbass. I was talking more about the attitude and the approach you adopt to interact with people." Amber was still watching her friend talking shocked.  
"You're delusional! What did they put in your pumpkin juice? Are you gone nuts?" Andromeda laughed again and Amber couldn't stop herself from following her.  
"See? I can smile and I can make people smile. One of the tons difference between me and Regulus"  
"Say what you want but I can find you a whole list of things you have in common."  
"That's all bullshit. Prove it."  
"First, you both are always on your defensive side, is way too easy for you to attack others."  
"I don't attack anybody!"  
"You never want to listen to what others have to say to you."  
"This is completely false!"  
"You're both touchy."  
"Am not."  
"And you're both too much sensible."  
"He's not sensible! He's a jerk. If he was sensible he would think about other's feelings too and he wouldn't be a sassy, egocentric, arrogant piece of-"  
"That's the appearance. He likes that others people see only this about him."  
"Then he's an idiot. Nobody would like a person like this." Andromeda smiled sadly at Amber like she had hit the point. But Amber didn't see any point in this. Or can she? The only thing she could think of was that he was trying to push away people. It was like he was afraid of people, or mostly afraid to be hurt by people and he was trying to force himself to avoid as possible as he could others, chosing to be a jerk. He didn't care if that means to hurt others since like this he was able to make them stay away from him. At the end he really was self-centered, but maybe he was also completely alone and afraid of what people were capable of. Just like her.

That night both Amber and Andromeda went to bed early, but Amber couldn't sleep. Her head was full of that guy she despised so much. She couldn't stop thinking of him. Maybe she had judged him too early. He was a jerk, but she never asked if there was a reason behind it. She was quite the bitch too if she wanted but Andromeda didn't judged her, Andromeda tried to understand her, like she was doing with Regulus. Maybe this jerk was hiding more suffering than anyone else. Maybe he was really just like her. Shattered, hurt and alone.

A/N: I'm pretty satisfied of this chapter. I worked hard on it and I hope it turned out well and if it doesn't...I'm sorry ;_; I promise I will improve! Have faith in me. *waves goodbye


	4. Chapter III - Secrets and expectations

**M** for language and sex talks (?)

 _Chapter III – Secrets and expectation_

Amber fell asleep too late that night. Her mind was hunting her and she couldn't find a way to stop her thoughts about a certain boy that she didn't even know. Andromeda's words pierced Amber, bringing on the surface doubts and questions. Her sleepless figure laid on the bed, trying to find a way to sleep even thought it seemed impossible with all the chaos buzzing in her mind. She tried to cover her head with the pillow but it was useless too. It's not like covering her ears was useful to anything. Andromeda's words keep echoing inside her head like a broken record. What was she supposed to do? At the end she barely know both Andromeda and Regulus. It wasn't her duty to be nice to a boy that she couldn't even stand. She snorted tired, focusing to shut her thoughts and regretting the Sleep Potion she was so used to take.

That morning started with to 2 hours of Magic History and Amber fought the necessity to close her eyes and sleep on her desk. After what seemed 4 hours she was ready but not happy to finally start Potions. She was too tired to talk and she realized she was less capable to handle Eris' quacking. Amber was sit with her pot right in front of her but she wasn't sure neither what potion they were asked to breed neither if she put in the right ingredients. When Slughorn approached her pot, with her surprise, he smiled amused. At least she achieved something good.

"What have you choose as extra subject, Divination or Ancient Runes?" Eris asked to Amber when they started to eat, sit on the Slytherin table in the Great Hall. Amber chewed slowly and swallowed before answer the question.

"Divination. Couldn't have chose other way." She shrugged. "Ancient Rune's way too demanding for me and it didn't seem a smart choice since I have problems with the other subjects." Amber smiled bitterly shaking her head.

"Why! I could have helped you!"

"Yeah, sure. So you had to baby sit me not only in Charms but also in Ancient Runes. I don't want to be a pain in the ass and it would have been embarrassing too. Absolutely no way. I don't want you to hate me or think at me as a weight."

"No weight, no hate." Andromeda smiled kindly to Amber.

"You can talk like this 'cause she didn't already set your hair on fire, Dromeda." Eris entered the conversation and both the 3 girls laughed.

"Careful Eris, if I was in you I would chose my words wisely." Amber looked at Eris sly and in response she put her hands on her blonde hair protecting them.

"Anyway, Eris follows Divination so you're not going to be alone." Added Andromeda sipping her pumpkin juice. "And not only me, even mister dreadfully hot and sexy Black follows Divination." Eris winked and Amber snorted with a face between the repulsion and the exasperation while Andromeda rolled her eyes. "Eris, trust me. Leave this Regulus thing away. It's not worth."

"You'll tell this directly to our children, telling them that if their mother had followed your advise they wouldn't have born." Eris pointed Amber with her fork.

"For what I can see I'm not entirely sure Regulus have a slight idea of how children born." Andromeda frowned concentrating like she was trying to understand a joke she hadn't catch. "Oh-Oh, you don't know about his reputation with girls for what _I_ can see." Eris smiled mischievous. "And-" Amber cut out "do you have your certification that state you're a pure blood? I think he would marry only one of them" Amber glanced Andromeda throw the corner of her eyes, noticing that she was acting like this thing didn't touch her. "How you dare! I descend from a rich and known family." then she made a puzzled expression like she was thinking about something. "Maybe I should bring a certification? He would like it?" Andromeda facepalmed her hard and Amber coughed, trying to cover her laugh. Then she made a more serious face and picked back the conversation.

"Perfect. You should stamp it no your clothes so he will definitely go after you." Andromeda was drinking and she almost choked on her juice laughing. "Stop treating my cousin like he's a gooddammit idiot, Amber."

"I'm sorry you're right. It's better if she get a tattoo of it." Amber frowned, still with a serious face. Andromeda smacked her arm. "I don't know if you two want to stop acting like idiots but my lessons' starting soon." Andromeda stood up. Suddenly Eris flashed on her feet like she was sitting on a spring. "You know what?" Eris caught Amber's arm and shoved her, dragging the two of them throw the door. "Let's ask Black if we can walk him to Divination. See you later Andromeda." Andromeda waved at them smiling. Regulus was going out the Great Hall in that moment when Eris, still dragging Amber, crashed him down.

"Hi Black, time for Divination right? Do you mind if we go together?" Eris smiled flirtatiously swaying closer to him. Amber wished he really minded it and walked away as rude as he was capable.

"Do whatever you like." He simply replayed. Eris smile widened and Amber followed them reluctantly. Regulus didn't seem to care much about Amber and she thought he was avoiding her. Eris on the contrary tried to bring up a conversation, flooding Regulus with questions to which he replayed lazily. Amber couldn't stop her to glance at him occasionally. Even thought he wasn't a sweet talker he was the one who stood more between Slytherins. She started to ask herself it this was only because of his social status and the Black's name. He was indeed a really handsome boy, fit, a prefect and the cap of Sytherin Quidditch team. To other people's eyes he had to appear like the most lucky boy, instead Amber had the weird sensation it wasn't like this. At first sight he seemed only a normal, tired and detached boy to her eyes. She forced herself for ignoring him too.

Once in class Eris followed Reglus and she sit near him leaving Amber alone. Amber, a little upset, sit the farest possible from them, in a table where a gloomy girl was already sitting. They didn't talk at all and neither they needed to work in pair since the professor came in a hurry giving as homework to write a summary of their planetary and astrological map from the start of summer to the end of it. The class protested loudly before she left the class leaving them free.

When Amber was finally out she didn't care to check about Eris. That afternoon lessons ended too soon and Andromeda wouldn't have been free for other two hours. She didn't like the idea to start already her homework, she was too tired for them. Instead she opted to take advantage of the good sunny weather and she walked out throw the Black Lake. She reached a clearing near the lakeside covered by a big three, away from the crowd, and she sit there, leaning against the three trunk. The weather was simply perfect: it wasn't really hot and you could catch the fresh air of the fall that was approaching. That spot was really quite and peaceful . She could catch now and then the sound of the water disturbed by the creatures gazing the topwater. Resting there she wasn't sure how much time passed by before she woke up from that beautiful pace by someone shouting at her.

"Ehi, that's our place dummy Slytherin. Move." Amber opened her eyes and turned upset to face the rude male that was shouting at her. He was a tall boy with a pair of rounded glassed and black hair and he was followed by three other boys. "So? Are you deaf maybe?" he crossed his arms and watched her with scorn.

"C'mon James, don't harass other students." The one who talked was the paled sandy hair boy that rolled his eyes. Amber hadn't enough strength for a fight. She just wanted to laid there, in peace and quiet, maybe trying to have a nap too while she was waiting for Andromeda.

"You can't call this harass, can you? If I want to properly call it i'll say it's more like… a matter of territory." This time was another one of the 4 boys to talk. Amber didn't care to watch him or protest, she was already too upset and she wanted to move away fast from the quartet of gits. She stood up and turned without watching and ended crashing in one of them. "Am I right?"she bumped in the boy who had spoke for last. He was really taller than Amber and he looked more older than the other 3. He had shaggy raven hair a little more longer than the one with glasses. He was smirking at her amused. She founded herself kidnapped by his eyes : a gray-silver color similar to Regulus' eyes, only a bit more darkened, like the fog. She was like paralyzed watching him right in the eyes. He grinned, his eyes nailed one her, before talking. "Sunshine, did you get stunned by my handsomeness?" Amber wasn't able to reply, she could only keep staring at him with a puzzled expression. He was indeed handsome and he was indeed a grown Regulus' copycat. They were like two peas in a pod, expect for this man facial contours that were more rough and defined than Regulus' one.

The black haired boy that was supposed to be James punched him in the arm."Oh give us a break, you cheap lover boy."

"Uh-uh I can tell why you're so envy. It must be hard to be so sexually frustrated, poor boy."

"I'm not frustrated, you gnats balls!"

"We should totally go for a _sflatable babe_ like as a gift for you, this Christmas. You can still name her Lily."

"What is a sfatable babe?" The fourth boy, who hadn't still talked, peeked in. He was more shorter and smaller than the other three boys and had a carved face and sunken eyes.

"Leaving by the fact that I'm pretty sure the name is _inflatable doll_ " replayed the sandy hair boy "You're making fools of yourself, like always" he sighed smirking at the other two boys. "Woa, Moony, didn't know you were so familiar in this area. Is it really hard for you to dominate your animal instincts?" Regulus' copycat replayed laughing hard and he was followed by James. The sandy hair boy watched him back with darkened face and he frowned, blushing slightly. "At least I don't need to mark my territory every 5 minutes."

James was still laughing hard and when he had done he ripped off tears from his eyes and looked to Amber, remembering she was still there watching them intensely. "So? Didn't you catch what I said before?"

This four-eyes jerk. Amber gained her sense back from her trance state, realizing she was still checking out the boy she bumped in a minute ago while he was still smirking at her. "Right, I'm really sorry. Nobody told me that you have to reserve you're place if you wanted to rest near the lake. Next time maybe you should put a sign if you don't want idiots like me to make mistakes." Amber gave him a dismissive glare.

"Everyone here knows this is our place!" James replayed in defiance.

"Oh, sorry, I didn't understand this when you talked before. I mean, it is indeed perfectly clear…" James smiled triumphant and Amber went on what she was saying, her usual sly smile on her lips and her eyes as mean as possible. "Four boys that hook-up here, in a romantic place away from any prying eyes…this is not your territory, it's your mating place." James was caught off guard, his smile no more in sight while the pale sickly boy and the little one watched her astonished.

They boy in front of her burst out laughing, embracing his arms around his belly. "This little girl has really a nice temper, I like her."

"You like every girl has a pretty face and can breathe on her own, Padfoot." The sandy hair boy replayed

"What about you then? When was the last time you were on heat? Two days ago?" Amber drifted her gaze to the 4 boys that were squabbling happily and for a moment she thought after all they weren't so bad.

"Ok, fine, I get it. I'm leaving" She replayed laughing, turning on her heels throw the castle's entrance. She heard a male voice shouting behind her again. "I'll catch you around Sunshine, it's a promise." She smiled to herself without turning to the boy.

She waited Andromeda in the Common Room sit on a couch near one of the large aquarium-windows, trying to start, defeated, her homework. She opted to start with the astrological map assigned during Divination. When Andromeda was back, sitting tired near her, Amber had completed only a month. "I have 3 translations to do, I'm so angry." She sighted, stretching on the couch. She glanced at Amber's parchment's roll. "What are you up too?"

"Divination's homework. Didn't know what to do while I was waiting for you, dear." Andromeda smiled to her and reached her homework joining Amber. "Well, the true is that at first I wished to go a little out, relaxing a little bit and taking fresh air. I founded a countering near the lake but I was assaulted by a group of Griffyndors, complaining about the fact I was in their spot. Can you believe it?" Amber rolled her eyes still upset by only thinking about it.  
"Oooh…yes. You had encountered for sure Potter and his team...They call themselves The Marauders." Andromeda stated in a serious tone and then giggled. "Well, I was sure Potter was starting to cool off now that he was nominated Headboy." "What the heck are you saying, how can he be a headboy." Andromeda giggled again.

"You had for sure the honor to meet my cousin." Realization hit Amber like a slap in the face.

"Wait a minute…so the boy identical to Regulus is-"

"His older brother, yeah. They really look alike, don't they? Well, at least on the appearance."

"I don't really know, Dromeda. To me they looked equally arrogant and self-absorbed."

"That's not true. Sirius is more funny and a living mess." Andromeda nodded to herself.

"So…this Sirius dude, he's the one that run away from home? Or there is another one?"

"Nope, he's the one. The only and truly Black who's ever been sorted in Gryffindor. Well, not that you couldn't expert that. He doesn't fit in the rest of the Black family" Andromeda shacked her head sadly. "Sirius is…different. In a positive way. Don't tell Regulus I said that or he'll get angry at me" Andromeda sighed. Amber nodded and she decided to no ask any more questions. They tried to reduce the amount of homework before dinner.

Amber watched around and she realized Regulus wasn't around there. Andromeda glanced at Amber with a knowing smile. "If you're looking for Regulus I think he has Aritmancy right now." Amber flinched watching Andromeda with offense. "I wasn't looking for Regulus!"

"Oooook." Andromeda smiled, again focused on her homework.

When they reached the Great Hall for dinner Amber noticed Regulus was sitting near an older student she didn't know. Andromeda, Amber and Eris were some seat far away from him. Eris glanced continuously to Regulus holding him under her eyes. Her obsession for Regulus Black was something that was beyond Amber's understanding.

Once again back in the Common Room, they decided to focus again on their homework. The 3 girls were already sit on a large table when Regulus crossed the room. "Oh, hey Black" Eris waved with her arm stretched in the air with loud voice "Do you mind doing some homework with us?" Regulus watched Eris for a second dumbfounded before he laid his eyes on Andromeda that was smiling happily at him and he seemed to convince himself to reach them. Eris was gloating satisfied ignoring the fact that the only reason Regulus was now sitting with them was because of Andromeda. "How was your first lesson of Aritmancy this year?" Andromeda asked.

"Devastating, I have so much stuff to do." He sighed annoyed.

"Black, you're not only tremendously handsome but smart too." Eris was watching him with dreamy eyes and he didn't seem to dislike the well settle praise. After all he was a overblown, know-it-all, arrogant, piece of…

"Amber have you finished Divination yet? It seem a pain in the ass." Eris glanced Amber's parchment .

"It is." She simply replay. Amber wasn't the one good in group's conversations. "I really hate Divination, an useless subject for what I think. You know" she started leaning more closely throw Regulus, with her usual flirtatious smile "I chose Divination only because I knew you choose it." Amber stifle hardly a laugh and she saw Andromeda burrow her in her Ancient Rune's translation.

"I must be a really lucky guy." Regulus replayed sarcastic without even watch Eris, focusing on his Aritmancy's homework. "Now that I think about this, I still don't understand why you didn't chose Ancient Rune and you chose to follow a stupid (I'm sorry Amber) subject like Divination." A little smile appeared on Regulus' face. "You want me that much to be in Ancient Runes with you, Dromeda?" Andromeda barely blushed before keep on. "It's just it didn't seem a smart choice for me."

"You're smarten than me than." He watched her smiling, not even a little bother by Andromeda assumptions.

"You know this isn't true." Andromeda glanced at him. "Just…I can't really understand" She softened her voice sighing.

"Maybe for once I didn't want to make a smart choice." Regulus murmured so low that Amber wasn't sure of what he had said. She looked at him for a brief moment before forgetting what she thought she had hear. The focus time on their homework was short because Eris started to talk again."Black, it's really true what I heard? That you're not going to date any girl anymore?"

"There isn't any girl worth the shot."

"Like you didn't already dated half of Slytherin girls" replayed Andromeda scowling him with a not really happy smile.

"But it's a waste!" mumbled Eris complaining. "Maybe you didn't look around so well." She added with a tempting tone.

Regulus looked up but not for watching Eris. His silver eyes pierced Amber. "I can confirm my choice. No one here is worth the shot." He replayed with superiority to Amber, with a sly smile peeping from his mouth. She flinched on her seat and she could sense her anger grow up.

"Like everyone aim to date you or fall at your feet, right? Maybe you are the one not worth." Amber blurted clearly insulted by his direct statement at her. She wasn't really sure why she was bothered by it but once again Regulus proved that he was nothing more than a fucking jerk. Amber could feel Andromeda near her trying to cover herself under her homework like she didn't really want to be a part in the conversation. Regulus leaned straight against the couch, his usual unreadable eyes set on hers, his head now resting on his closed hand, the eyebrow on the arm of the couch. "Why are you so fired up? Did I maybe touch a soft spot? For what I can see nobody line up for you." Amber was quite red over her face, not because she was embarrassed but because she was boiling with anger. "Then you aren't properly watching." Andromeda peeked in watching Regulus with grudge "She is a really beautiful girl."

" Sure but, you know, it's not just the outside that matter."

Amber couldn't believe it. Regulus was openly starting a fight with her for no reason. They spent the morning and the afternoon ignoring each others. She didn't remarked anything he had say. She wasn't even paying any attention at him but, for some unknown and inexplicable reason, he had a wish to being a completely dickhead. "You know a little something about it, right Black?" The two of them glared to each other with pure hate printed over their face. She swear to herself she never would have been able to stand him. For her Regulus Black was and would have remained an egocentric, narcissist and obnoxious jerk.

"Well, in my eyes you're perfect, Black." Continued Eris with disregard "I will be well dispose to fulfill every desire you have" Regulus raised an eyebrow watching her as if he was considering her offer. She leaned even more, only a inch away from him. He retired himself a little to reset the space within them . "and with every desire I mean even the physical one of course."

"Eris!" Andromeda shouted, calling back the blonde. "Regain a little of grace, you impudent girl!" she blurted embarrassed.

"Oh, shut the fuck up Andromeda. Don't you think it's time for you to stop this farce? Just because you're a virgin it doesn't mean you have to act like a goody-two shoes, you're not a kid." Andromeda glowed red. "Only because _I_ don't act like a whore it doesn't mean I'm a goody-two shoes. I have my principles."

"Sure thing, but your so-called principles would bring you to die virgin." Both Regulus and Amber now were uncomfortable about the direction this conversation had take.

"This is enough! Look if I have to be criticized by a girl who ended up sleeping with half of Hogwarts." Amber didn't know that even the sweet and gentle Andromeda could be this angry at someone.

"So what? You should thank me, at the end I screw for you too."

"I don't need that nobody…nobody…."Andromeda was turning in a shade of purple. "nobody does anything for me." Regulus tried to focus again on his homework and Amber decided to imitate him. She was really sorry for the way Eris treated Andromeda but Amber had to admit that Andromeda was a little exaggerate about the sexual thing, she wasn't even able to talk freely about it. She wasn't even able to say the world "sex".

"Andromeda, we're not in the Dark Ages anymore. Women should talk freely about this things." Amber asked herself if the definition Eris had about "talk freely about sex" was equivalent to "slut". Andromeda hesitate, unsure to how replay. She intercepted Amber eyes, begging for her help. "Give me a hand here, please! Haven't you anything to say about this?"

Amber wasn't sure about what to say, but for sure she didn't want Eris to keep on bitching Andromeda. "Well, I'm sure Andromeda's right." Andromeda crossed her arms amused but still red all over her face. Eris watched Amber incredulously. "Give me a break! You are the one who talks, Amber? You, that already got laid? Didn't think you were an hypocrite." Eris shouted and everyone's eyes in the room turned to watch Amber.

. twitched on her sit and then she was like paralyzed. Andromeda watched her with wide eyes, while Regulus had a strange look on his face. Amber wished to her inner witch for being able to disappear or she hoped at least she had learn a spell to make herself invisible. Andromeda turned suddenly to Eris with a demoniac expression. Eris snorted "What? She said it to me. I didn't know have sex was a secret thing, unless she didn't lie." She tried to put herself on the defensive side. Andromeda merely spoke out a "Shut. Up."

Amber without noticing it turned her eyes on Regulus and she saw he was ready to open his mouth. Amber suddenly stood up, knowing the eyes were still on her, without any will to hear what Regulus was about to say or to keep on the conversation. "I…well…l forgot…my parchments. Yes." She said hastily starting to recollect her things. "Goodnight then" and she walked really fast throw girl's dormitory leaving the Common Room behind her.

Once in her room she closed the door, leaning against it, her body so heavy it was hard to stand still. She embraced her knees with her face pressing on them. Her head was full of voices, her body was shaking at the memory of that night. _I'm strong. I can handle this,_ she keep chanting to her. "You can keep tellining this to yourself, my dear, but you'll never be free." His voice was like a cold shower that triggered every little nerve endings in her fragile body. What scared her the most in that moment wasn't the fact that she was hearing the voice of a dead man, not as much as the fact that she knew he was right: she will never be free.

A/N: I dont' own HP, Cya~


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